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Sassy with Cassie: I want a cool Instagram

How much time does one have to dedicate to have a cool Instagram or social media account?

I mean, I spend way, way too much time scrolling through Instagram, Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, etc., but have you ever posted a selfie?

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I am very pro-selfie, but it’s a fudging process.

Step 1: Fix makeup, hair, outfit, lighting, angle.

Step 2: Take 50 pictures making various playful or casual facial expressions.

Step 3: Review photos.

Step 4; Delete all photos.

Step 5: Repeat steps 1-4 in a new, better location.

This level of difficulty doesn’t only apply to selfies but also food. My best friend and I spend most of the day tagging each other in food porn. Like, “That cheesy panini looks like an orgasm for the taste buds, and I am all about it.”

But have you ever cooked a delectable, semi-complicated meal and tried to capture it?

I will make the most delicious and satisfying breakfast skillet for brunch, but in the initial picture, it looks like curdled milk and rotten vegetables. Instagram has made me realize food photography is an art. 

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And then we have Snapchat. The other day my friend informed me that I look like a crazy cat lady on snapchat.

“But that’s not even my cat,” I said. “It’s my roommate’s.”

She stood by her statement, and I attempted to make it look cooler. But when I do not leave my apartment for 36 hours straight on the weekend, it’s hard to look cool.

Bloggers always look cool because people pay them to look cool on social media. Dream job: Travel companies paying me to look cool on Instagram. What a life. I could stop posting pictures of me and my roommate’s cat on Snapchat.

Then there’s Twitter. I would rather not post about the mundane activities of my day, so I try to be witty, unsuccessfully. I most recently posted about an expired rice cake ruining my night. It did. Everyone, expired rice cakes taste like terrible.

Lastly, we have Facebook. The hub for people from high school to share racist articles from not-so-credible sources. Everyone looks dumb on Facebook – that’s it.

To me, social media can feel like a job. I have to set aside time in my day to work on a certain post. So how do these accounts with five+ posts a day live? I kind of wish my Instagram was cool, but not if it makes my day less cool.

Employers looks at social media now – it is expected. So I vow to not spend an hour filtering one picture or wording one post. My new social media motto shall be “post and go” in an attempt to not obsess over my image in the digital world. Also, less scrolling and more looking up.

Collegian A&E Columnist Cassie Maack can be reached at entertainment@collegian.com or on Twitter @maackcl.

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