Editor’s Note: All opinion section content reflects the views of the individual author only and does not represent a stance taken by The Collegian or its editorial board.
It’s the middle of August, and you’ve just moved into your new, most likely janky, home for the year, which you share with a stranger. It’s also likely the start of your first extended leave from wherever you call home. You’re on your own. The easiest way to ease your nerves? To check TikTok to see how the rest of the world is dealing with the same struggles or endless Instagram scrolling while wondering why your comment section is full even though you don’t have anyone to go to the dining hall with.
For many college students, attending university is one of the first times they’ve had to start fresh when making friends. Friendships begin at age 6 on the playground and follow a natural progression from there. Those close-knit friendships are harder to come by as thousands of students fill college campuses every year. In a generation raised by the internet, we have, in part, lost touch when it comes to establishing face-to-face connections.
Too often we are convinced the key to making lifelong friendships is fine-tuning our online personas into oblivion. It’s hard not to believe that, considering almost every connection is seemingly reinforced by a digital log to prove its worth. The truth is, you can’t depend on the internet to make up for poor social skills. Despite how normalized our generation has made it seem, you can’t digitally curate a genuine connection.
Chemistry, whether be platonic or romantic, is imperfect and raw. It takes effort and, at the very least, actual real-life experiences to create; it’s rare. Commenting back and forth on an acquaintance’s posts isn’t going to do the trick. Just putting yourself out there doesn’t guarantee right-off-the-bat friendships. The first 50 people you meet might not be one of your future friends, but that’s the fun of it.
When you ultimately do end up meeting those few — or many — people that you actually click with, your day-to-day hurdles begin to seem more manageable and nights out feel extra memorable. The jump from lonely dinners at the dining hall to framed group photos isn’t really a jump at all — it’s a slow progression created through getting to know someone through their highs and lows, truly understanding the people that you surround yourself with.
It is far more fulfilling to have a few people you can actually depend on rather than a few dozen who only know you based on your last Instagram post — even if it takes a while.
While the fear of being lonely can be daunting, it does not define one’s character or worth — the act of trying does. The phrase “Put yourself out there” is no doubt both frightening and cliche, but it’s true. The most difficult issues often have the simplest solutions.
Reach Gia Galindo-Bartley at letters@collegian.com or on social media @RMCollegian.
