Bailey: You won’t survive the apocalypse

Fynn Bailey

Editor’s Note: All opinion section content reflects the views of the individual author only and does not represent a stance taken by The Collegian or its editorial board.

The sad reality is if the world comes to an end, you will end with it.


It feels like the end of the world is on many people’s minds considering the constant news coverage of COVID-19. Even before this pandemic, there were many people that were willing to talk about their end of the world plan. Whether it’s nukes flying, zombies or COVID-19, these people figure they’ve got a pretty good plan to dodge all danger and come out of it as some sort of tough last person on Earth.

That is pure fantasy, and worse, it’s a really unhelpful fantasy. Shows like Doomsday Preppers and InfoWars perpetuate these fantasies in a romantic and unhelpful way. What’s worse is that these fantasies are about as defeatist as a daydream can go. These people’s plans never involve political action before nukes fly or building a wall around their entire town after the first zombie is seen or anything even remotely helpful to stop or prevent the world from crumbling.

That’s because, at its heart, the idea of prepping for the End Times is a selfish one. It’s one that relies on everything going horribly for everyone but the one prepping.

Even now, we can see the selfishness of these people who are ready for things to go sideways. COVID-19 is not an end-time pandemic, even though the fatality count feels like it. It’s a very serious, very tangible problem — so you all better be social distancing — but it’s not the apocalypse.

Even still, these prep-for-themselves types have come out of the woodwork and are buying all the toilet paper, are buying all the guns and are making a serious crisis a lot worse for everyone else so they can play just a part of their last person on Earth fantasy.

How would a gun even help you right now? What are you going to do? Are you going to shoot the virus, or is it so you can shoot people later in your wasteland daydream? Stocking up on guns isn’t the smart thing to do right now.

Listen closely, apocalypse preppers. If the world ends — and hear me out on this — then you will die. You will not survive an apocalypse no matter how many bullets or how much toilet paper you buy.

That’s because, at its heart, the idea of prepping for the End Times is a selfish one. It’s one that relies on everything going horribly for everyone but the one prepping.”

If the nukes fall in your area, you will die. If they aren’t in your area, nuclear winter from the blasts will likely kill you. If it’s zombies, you will become a zombie. You will die. If there someday is a plague that kills 99.99% of humans, you are not the .01%. If anyone is going to make it through these scenarios, it’s Jeff Bezos in a James Bond villain evil island base. It’s not Mark who works in an office and hunts on the weekends.

If the world ends for whatever reason, that includes you.


So please, give up these worthless fantasies and grow some compassion for others around you. If we’re going to survive or overcome big crises, we have to work together and look out for each other. We have to work on making our society a better place and one that is more equipped to handle crises. The United States was not equipped to handle this current crisis, and that’s something we can learn from.

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We need to work as one and do right by each other. We can’t do that and still have people who plan on being the last person on Earth.

In the face of this current COVID-19 pandemic, practice social distancing, wash your hands, stop buying all the toilet paper and stop buying guns. Instead, find a way to help those around you. 

Fynn Bailey can be reached at or on Twitter @FynnBailey.