Seriously: North Dakota vs. South Dakota

Sean Kennedy

This election cycle marked the debut of both North Dakota and South Dakota in national news, North Dakota for stealing land from its Native American population and South Dakota for declaring a state of emergency to deal with the crisis of voter-approved ethics regulations. Both places are pretty messed up right now, but which state is the crappiest to live in? Here’s how they stack up:

 

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North Dakota

South Dakota

Climate

Cold and shitty

Slightly less cold and shitty

Shape

Elongated square

Definitely not a rectangle

Main Geographical Feature

Oil fields?

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A mountain with faces on it

Demographics

Mayonnaise

Sour cream

State Motto

“At least we’re not Wyoming”

“At least we’re not Wyoming”

Native Americans?

Not if we can help it

Some

North?

Yes

No

South?

No

Yes

Politics

Republican

Very Republican

Likes government accountability

No

NO

Even remotely cool?

No

No


Collegian Assistant Enterprise Editor and Blogger Sean Kennedy can be reached at blogs@collegian.com or on Twitter. He also creates video for 90.5 KCSU, check it out! Also, leave a comment if you like!!

Disclaimer: Seriously is a satire blog, which may or may not use real names, often in semi-real or mostly fictitious ways. All articles from Seriously are creations of fiction, and presumably fake publications. Any resemblance to the truth is purely coincidental, except for all references to politicians and/or celebrities, in which case they are fictitious events based on real people. Photos used do not have any connection to the story and are used within the rights of free reuse, as well as cited to the best of our ability. Seriously is intended for a mature, sophisticated, and discerning audience.