This b*tch.

On Facebook.

Traveling the damn world.

Where did she even get all this money? And why isn’t she in school? Does she even have a job?

God, this girl sucked in high school. She probably still sucks. By the look of her perfect hair, she honestly probably sucks worse, if that was even possible.

Nice. She’s with some handsome-looking Italian man. Honestly, this guy is exquisitely muscular. Oh, and look, he cooks too.

Whatever.

Oh, wow. Apparently, she’s drinking wine in a vineyard. She captioned the photo “finding myself in strange places.” Really?

Why are her teeth so white?

Is she doing the splits on the beach? This is honestly a beautiful photo.

Ugh.

Look at her playing tennis. What a dumb sport. But, she does have incredible form. Is that Adriano Panatta? Does everyone in Italy look like that?

She seems so happy watching the sunset in Positano. Is that even a real city?

Your hate for this girl is totally merited.

Wow, she looks great in that bikini.

This is probably not healthy for you.

Collegian Satire Blogger Tatiana Parafiniuk-Talesnick can be reached online at blogs@collegian.com or on Twitter @TatianaSophiaPT.