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Falling in love, getting married and having kids has become a default setting in our society. Everyone is expected to “settle down” at some point.
As college students, our main concern is getting through mid-terms and surviving another school year. Even though some people do plan on having families soon, data shows that U.S. birthrates are declining.
“F*ck dem kids” is a classic line delivered by comedian and actor Bernie Mac in the 2008 comedy “Soul Men”. In the past couple of months, social media has taken the phrase and applied it to memes and thousands of tweets.
just took a plan b fuck them kids
— Madeline (@madelinesmoth) February 23, 2019
Tweets surrounding this phrase are usually jokes when referring to overcoming pregnancy scares and being annoyed with children.
The most famous tweet concerns news that the Gaza Zoo in Palestine had a lion’s claws ripped out so that children could play with it. Social media responded: “F*ck them kids.”
The use of the phrase brings attention to the fact that not everyone wants to have a family and no one should feel expected to have kid. This generation is moving away from this mindset.
While the phrase is vulgar and used in a humorous way, the fact that social media has made it so popular is shows how society is progressing and ridding itself of the idea that a family means happiness and success.
Individuals who do not want children are labeled as selfish and even anti-child. Women especially are shamed for not wanting to go through labor and having a family, and sometimes deemed as less because of this
Natalie Ramtahal, a master’s student and food blogger in Toronto, said she is firm on her decision to not having children. “We live in a society that thinks women aren’t complete if they aren’t married or don’t have children,” Ramtahal said. “I spent a lot of time in my early 30s really thinking about why I didn’t want them and whether I would regret this choice.”
Ramtahal accepts that there may have been a day she regretted the choice, but most of the time, she celebrates it.
According to a US study, birth rates among women in their 20s have declined by 15 percent between 2007 and 2012, and one in five women enter menopause without children.
Lifestyle blogger, Jenny Mustard, made a YouTube video titled ‘Why I Don’t Want Kids” explaining her decision.
“I concentrate on the things I find important and pleasurable – such as my job, traveling, cooking and reading,” Mustard said in the video. “Prioritizing what to spend my energy on, instead of making lifestyle choices based on what I ‘should’ do according to the norms of our society.”
When someone shares that they do not want to have children, they should not be interrogated as to why, shamed for not wanting to ‘settle down’ or try to be convinced that they will eventually change their mind.
There are people who are sure that they don’t want to have kids and that is okay.
If you are sure you want a family in the future, that’s great, but those who don’t want kids know what will make them happy and that needs to be respected equally as much.
Kenia Ortiz can be reached at letters@collegian.com or online at @Kenia_Ortiz_