The Student News Site of Colorado State University

The Rocky Mountain Collegian

The Student News Site of Colorado State University

The Rocky Mountain Collegian

The Student News Site of Colorado State University

The Rocky Mountain Collegian

Print Edition
Letter to the editor submissions
Have a strong opinion about something happening on campus or in Fort Collins? Want to respond to an article written on The Collegian? Write a Letter to the Editor by following the guidelines here.
Follow Us on Twitter
Flower Power Botanicals in Fort Collins Celebrates ‘420’ all April with these amazing Deals & Promotions:
April 15, 2024

In Colorado, April is always the month to celebrate, especially if you are a medical and recreational marijuana dispensary in Fort Collins. On...

Seriously: 5 ways to get (and keep!) the boy

Right now, you are likely in the throws of a summer fling, and if you’re not, you probably desperately wish you were.

Either way, here are some simple tips to get (or keep!) the boy:

Ad

Photo courtesy of pixabay.com
Photo courtesy of pixabay.com

1. Leave out a simple bear trap

As with most things, your first idea is usually your best. Bear traps are easy to use and cause minimal damage to the creature you’re trying to catch. Usually.

 

Photo courtesy of vice.com
Photo courtesy of vice.com

2. Create a Home Alone style booby trap

For the more clever boys who are too smart for bear traps, but are still dumb enough to date you. Be creative here. If you can get him to trip over a yo-yo string pulled tight across a doorway, you can definitely get him to fall for you.

 

 

 

Ad

Photo courtesy of whereto get.it
Photo courtesy of whereto get.it

3. Tell him you’re not like other girls

This statement is so vague, it’s genius. No other line can better convey that you’re quirky, but approachable, while really saying nothing at all.

 

Photo courtesy of houzz.com
Photo courtesy of houzz.com

4. Shave your pubic hair into the shape of his initials

This is a sexy touch that ought to really impress your soon-to-be-semi-permanent-lover. It says “I like you, I know your name, and I’m probably real good at managing a lawn.”

Photo courtesy of shutterstock.com

Photo courtesy of shutterstock.com

5. Follow good interactions with acting cold and aloof

You never want to seem too desperate. This should make you an intriguing mystery he just wants to unravel. 

 

With these tips, you’ll be unstoppable. So get going!

Collegian Satire Blogger Tatiana Parafiniuk-Talesnick can be reached online at blogs@collegian.com or on Twitter at @TatianaSophiaPT.

 

 

 

Leave a Comment
More to Discover

Comments (0)

When commenting on The Collegian’s website, please be respectful of others and their viewpoints. The Collegian reviews all comments and reserves the right to reject comments from the website. Comments including any of the following will not be accepted. 1. No language attacking a protected group, including slurs or other profane language directed at a person’s race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, social class, age, physical or mental disability, ethnicity or nationality. 2. No factually inaccurate information, including misleading statements or incorrect data. 3. No abusive language or harassment of Collegian writers, editors or other commenters. 4. No threatening language that includes but is not limited to language inciting violence against an individual or group of people. 5. No links.
All The Rocky Mountain Collegian Picks Reader Picks Sort: Newest

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *