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The Rocky Mountain Collegian

The Student News Site of Colorado State University

The Rocky Mountain Collegian

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Seriously: Ram-cademy awards: Here’s what CSU won

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Collegian | Kathryn Pakiz

Editor’s Note: This is a satire piece from The Collegian’s opinion section. Real names and the events surrounding them may be used in fictitious/semi-fictitious ways. Those who do not read the editor’s notes are subject to being offended.

The academy award season has taken over America. With the Emmys and Golden Globes ceremonies out of the way, it is now time for the Oscars to step in.  

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Award shows are always fun to watch: the celebrations, the records broken, the drama, the crash-and-burns of hosts who can’t land a single joke (cough cough Jo Koy). Award recognition unites actors who share beautiful emotions with the viewers who love to witness those emotions alongside them.

Unfortunately, however, these ceremonies also include a lot of snubs: people or productions that arguably deserved to sweep but left the ceremony empty-handed. What is the biggest snub of all, you ask? Well, it’s Colorado State University, of course. Here are five awards the Rams knocked out of the park. 

Best Collegiate Feature in an Award-Winning Show

It would be a dishonor to not mention this amazing feat. In an episode of Max’s award-winning show “The Last of Us,” lead characters Joel and Ellie stumble upon a college campus titled University of Eastern Colorado. Their mascot? The Big Horns.

This is clearly a nod to CSU — our dearly loved CAM the Ram is a bighorn sheep. Being featured in a show that won eight Emmys? Boulder could never.

Best Dedication to Green

CSU’s dedication to sustainability on campus and throughout Fort Collins is no secret; we’ve been a top dog among higher education for years, already topping charts of the most green colleges in 2024.

According to a CSU SOURCE article about sustainability, over 90% of CSU’s academic departments have participated in at least one research project related to sustainability. We also offer over 800 courses that include sustainability and consistently give fresh produce to the campus food pantry. Due to all of these accomplishments, and all of those to come, CSU walked away with the Best Dedication to Green in 2023.

Best Original Score

A film’s or television show’s original score is a piece of music specifically created for that production alone. Although Christopher Nolan’s “Oppenheimer” won Best Original Score at the Golden Globes, and as much as I loved that soundtrack, CSU more than deserves this award.

The fight song? Impeccable. The on-campus performance by Goose this past October? Amazing. The artists touring in Aggie Theatre? Incredibly talented. The Fort Collins music scene simply cannot go unrecognized.

Best College Town Eats

As CSU students, we have a variety of delicious foods right at our fingertips. Fort Collins has some of the best eats to offer in Northern Colorado, if not the best out of every college town. No matter if you’re craving something sweet at Walrus Ice Cream, something savory at Slyce Pizza Co., a bite of seafood at Jaws Sushi or a drink at one of our breweries, Fort Collins has got you covered — and for that reason, CSU has the best college town eats.

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Best Student Media Company

Shameless plug. Come join Rocky Mountain Student Media if you want to be part of an eccentric, award-winning community. This one is just another trophy on a very long list of CSU’s many accomplishments. 

Reach Emma Souza at letters@collegian.com or on Twitter @_emmasouza.

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