Use college as a time for learning, not loving

Chapman W.

chapman croskell
Chapman Croskell

Relationships are complicated.

There’s really no denying the simple fact that relationships are not always easy, and can very quickly offer excess stress into our lives. And yet, so many of my college-aged peers seem far too insistent on being in relationships as often as possible. To me, this seems like a waste of the potential that comes along with being at such a freeing time in our lives.


Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti-relationship. Plenty of my friends are in relationships, and plenty of said couples are adorable. As long as they’re healthy and happy, relationships are fantastic to be in, and can add something positive to life.

However, the push for monogamy that seems to exist for many millennials around the age of 18 to 22 seems almost unhealthy to me. And I think that it all comes down to my belief that my early 20s should be a time of learning in my life.

I spent the last few years in and out of relationships, and although I’m not denying the perks that come along with dating someone, it would not be fair to not include some of the other things that come along with being committed as well.

Being in a relationship is absolutely limiting when it comes to trying new things, and living life in the moment. Even with a stable, healthy couple, there will always be some boundaries that keep the members of the relationship from trying things with no external bias and from making mistakes.

Personally, I’m all for making mistakes. Just not mistakes that are going to hurt another person who I care about. It seems that the best solution is to spend my college years less focused on pursuing love and more focused on living for myself. I’m not saying that I’ll outright refuse to date anyone in college, but I’m going to take advantage of the time when I’m single and the time where I can do so many things that I want to do, without any regard as to whether I’m going to hurt my significant other with my actions.

I’m going to take this time in my life to learn about who I am, and so when someone comes along that I want to be with, I’m ready to spend time learning about them instead.

Collegian Reporter Chapman Croskell can be reached at and on Twitter @Nescwick.