Five ways to celebrate a non-spooky Halloween

Nick Botkin

A row of pumpkins line hay bales
You can still get into the Halloween spirit without bloodbaths and exorcisms. (Photo courtesy of Jenny Lee | Collegian)

Halloween does not have to be spooky.

I know that sounds sacrilegious. My apologies, Dracula.

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If you need to keep it low-key, there are plenty of ways to do it. These are just a few friendly suggestions. If you have your own unique rituals, keep the spirit alive!

Eat candy

Yes, the powers that be have made adult trick-or-treating verboten. But make a night of it yourself. Buy candy. Lots of it. 

Make Willy Wonka look like a lightweight. Pile on the Reese’s peanut butter cups.  Go for the Almond Joys. Get a good variety of candy from across the spectrum.

Release the childish glee that college cynicism has tried to suppress. Have candy for dinner.

You know what makes for a sumptuous dessert, after the candy?

You guessed it. More candy.

 Another plus of candy night at home: You do not have to compete with enthusiastic trick-or-treaters.

Have a Halloween beer

 This is Fort Collins.  Halloween offers an opportunity to have fun with our local traditions.

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If you are over 21, have a Halloween-themed beer. New Belgium gets into the spirit of the season with their “Voodoo Ranger Atomic Pumpkin,” among other seasonal offerings. Dress up and drink beer. Meet up with friends and talk about life, while the vampires and ghouls are out and about. Maybe you will get a discount from that bartender, who admires your costume.

Have a cup of Joe

Have a pumpkin-flavored drink or other Halloween treat. This is a good option, especially if beer is less than appealing. Plus, having coffee offers a space to reflect on your week and on the season.

Watch a movie

No mayhem here.  Avoid “The Exorcist,” “Texas Chainsaw Massacre,” or “IT.” Try something different. There are plenty of supernatural, non-freaky flicks out there. Laugh at “The Addams Family.” For something truly benign, enjoy “Casper.” I mean, how can you hate a friendly ghost? Have a good Halloween movie marathon. Fire up the Netflix. Find time for your Amazon Prime.

Also, during your movie-watching session, watch Saturday Night Live’s 2016 “Haunted Elevator” sketch. This is an order. Tom Hanks   is at his finest as the lovable David S. Pumpkins.  The character has become so beloved that last Halloween, David S. Pumpkins costumes sold out quickly.

Sure it has dancing skeletons. Honestly, though, how can you be scared of Hanks’ youthful grin?  You have to love the way he says, “how’s it hanging?” with ghoulish energy. Plus it is funnier because no one in the sketch knows just who Pumpkins is or his purpose.  

Decorate

 Turn your home into an absolute work of art. Halloween is about getting creative and funky. String up lights if you like. Craft friendly jack-o-lanterns. Do something that reflects the spirit and cheer of the season. Show off your own vision of Halloween. Make a statement, bold, subtle, or somewhere in between.

Happy Halloween, my non-spooky friends.

Halloween Fun fact:  In the late 19th and early 20th centuries, there was a movement in the United States to take all things spooky out of the holiday. Its leaders sought to emphasize community and social opportunities instead.

Collegian reporter Mir-Yashar Seyedbagheri can be reached at entertainment@collegian.com. His Twitter handle is @dudesosad