Henry: Halloween is the best holiday because it’s for everyone

Collegian | Ava Kerzic

Brendan Henry, Staff Reporter

Editor’s Note: All opinion section content reflects the views of the individual author only and does not represent a stance taken by The Collegian or its editorial board.

The days of Mariah Carey and ancient recordings of Christmas jingles on a loop in every store and restaurant are on the horizon. Momentarily, the fear of the holiday season can be pushed aside for the more fun, self-inducing fear of Halloween.

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Halloween is the best holiday. Some folks are not connoisseurs of fear, which is totally understandable, yet one does not need to be scared to enjoy the season of spook thoroughly. There are plenty of things to enjoy about the holiday that both include and exclude the scares and raised hair. 

Many children carry bags and buckets from door to door to fill their containers with candy, lacking any foresight regarding their next trip to the dentist potentially turning sour. Admiring other children’s costumes and inhaling the mass accumulation of candy is a vivid childhood memory for many. Halloween as a child was always something to look forward to. 

As people grow older, it becomes less and less acceptable to receive candy without going through the typical step of purchasing it on Halloween, so some individuals with a level of grouch equivalent to Holden Caulfield from “The Catcher in the Rye” invented the concept of the Halloween party. It was at that moment the acceptability of people over the age of 10 going somewhere while wearing a costume went up drastically. Now the holiday is open up to any age group for fun. 

“Embracing the spirit of Halloween (not to be confused with the Halloween store) is necessary to gather enough sanity to make it through the final holidays of the year.”

Any holiday where a grown man can dress up as mustard and get blackout drunk is a great holiday. Sexy nurse outfits could certainly be worn at any time of the year, but for some reason, they make more sense when worn at the same party as the drunken mustard man.

These two preceding sentences may seem ridiculous — and they certainly are — but they help make the point that Halloween is the holiday that bests all other days that dare declare themselves important. 

Thanksgiving is OK. Families join together to do their best at making food and not talking about politics. The only way to release the tension in the room is by initiating a full-contact backyard football game. It’s all fun and games until everyone is passed out around the house from the ungodly levels of turkey tryptophan and carbohydrates consumed. 

December is the worst. Buying everyone anyone has ever known a gift they probably will only react to with artificial enthusiasm leads the December holiday season to trail far behind the Halloween era of October. 

Embracing the spirit of Halloween (not to be confused with the Halloween store) is necessary to gather enough sanity to make it through the final holidays of the year. When political debate drowns out the commentators for the Thanksgiving NFL prime-time game, think back to when the mustard man broke through that table because he lost a game of King’s Cup. 

Take advantage of Halloween. It only comes once a year.

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Reach Brendan Henry at letters@collegian.com or on Twitter @BrendanHenryRMC.