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What will you do next?
This question haunts many students as they approach and enter their last year of college. The future can be a terrifying concept to think about. The creeping sense and expectation that we’re supposed to have it all figured out by the inevitable end of our college careers is a consistent and anxiety-provoking worry.
I find myself floating in the same boat as I approach the end of my time as an undergraduate student. Similarly, the future of my life has been weighing heavily on my mind. Since the beginning of my third year, I’ve constantly feared the expectation that I have to have my future all figured out and in a picture-perfect order before graduation. I refuse to believe that just because the clock is ticking means I have to decide what I want to do with the rest of my life, all before the seconds run out.
It’s OK and normal to not know who we are yet; existential anxiety is a natural part of becoming an adult. We are in it together as emerging adults, characterized by — and not limited to — instability, identity exploration and self-focus. Though there’s a world of uncertainty and a multitude of possibilities, the fear behind it all doesn’t have to be as scary as it seems. Rather than looking at the future as the end, we can reframe it as a new beginning. One door closes, but another opens.
Future anxiety is a prominent issue among university students — specifically, the fear of failure and choosing a job that leads to a successful future. As students take on harder courses and immerse themselves within opportunities that reveal what their future may look like, anxiety about lacking control over the inevitable end — and what comes after — sets in. Life can also feel like it’s moving so fast, especially during closing chapters. The stress of figuring it all out is real.
But there are many solutions to help us find the support and structure we desire on campus. As a student who hasn’t previously utilized career services or university networks, I’ve now been taking more of an initiative to seek guidance. Professors are a great resource for inquiring about mentorships, job shadowing, teaching assistantships, graduation experience or simply tips and advice. If talking to a professor isn’t up your alley, there’s a variety of lectures, workshops and panel discussions that provide useful resources. Many universities even have campus events with guest lecturers and conferences designed to prepare students for their futures. Your university wants to see you succeed — seek out a conversation.
The lack of direction and belonging throughout graduation transitions, along with identity confusion, creates the desire to compare ourselves to others, as explained by Leon Festinger’s social comparison theory. But practicing mindfulness by identifying the comparison and shifting from envy to exploration can reduce the harm of comparison and normalize struggle and insecurity during this transition.
Everyone’s journey is different, and some may have more figured out than others, but uncertainty is not failure; it’s room to try new things without a defined ending. By practicing acceptance and mindfulness, the end of college feels more tolerable. We can listen to the worries and understand where they come from and then use them as motivation to lean into the flourishing opportunities of growth, learning and connection.
The future and the end of the college chapter is inevitable. Accepting these uncontrollable changes and endings rather than resenting and pushing away from them is a huge step for approaching graduates. The transition from school to post-graduate living can be emotionally challenging; not understanding where to go or how to do it is extremely normal.
It’s also incredibly important to acknowledge how far we’ve come. The days and nights of studying for stressful exams, diligently working on group projects and piecing together our hopes for the future have finally come to an end. Take a second to think about it: We did this. You did that. College is not easy, so this incredible chapter is something to be extremely proud of. Through the stressful tears and worried fears of doing your best — let alone enough — you made it to the end.
With that being said, I invite you to write a letter to yourself. Be honest and accepting of where you are currently in your journey. Reflect on the person you’ve become and the experiences you’ve endured throughout the past few years. Write about the resources that have helped you find your way or about feeling lost and scared. Write to your younger self and tell them all you’ve done. Maybe you aren’t happy with the direction your path is going — that is completely and utterly OK. But write to your current self with kindness and gratitude. You have come so far.
Time is an uncontrollable concept, and yet, you have so much of it left to choose the person you would like to become. As we begin this journey together, let’s allow the time to remember and utilize the resources we have for guidance. Mindfully accept the time we have left, and practice gratitude. We have made it so far, and there is so much to be proud of.
Reach Stella Trojanowski at letters@collegian.com or on social media @RMCollegian.
