Clark is a truly terrifying building.
Students have had their own particular experiences with this notorious edifice, or should I say edifices.
Nathan Palardy is a first-year PhD student in agricultural economics.
His worst experience? The creatures in the ceiling.
“I hear them scurrying around,” Palardy said. “I don’t know what they are. I wouldn’t want to guess.”
Others have a less-than-fond relationship with the basement of Clark C.
“The stairs are really ominous,” said Jaynee Halverson, a senior agricultural education major. “It is not really accessible.”
What makes the stairs so ominous?
“Those ones that curve around to a door, but they also curve around to a corner,” Halverson said.
Kelsey Kimberling, a freshman human development and family studies major, also had her own run-in with the basement when she got lost.
The ambiance was less-than-welcoming with a cold breeze coming from the ceiling and the white walls made Clark feel like an asylum, she said.
“It looks creepy from the outside,” said Kindra Alley, a freshman criminology major.
Alley also dislikes the round ornaments on the building’s external walls.
“They are weird,” she said. “Why are they even there?”
Will Jones, a senior journalism major, has had his share of problems. Among them? The haunting experiences in the courtyard.
“There are always wandering eyes,” Jones said.
There are ghouls and goblins on the balconies, according to Jones.
“They are just messing around, talking, making fun of people,” Jones said.
And the nature of their ghoulish judgments?
“Look at that asshole wearing shorts,” Jones said, quoting an unnamed creature.
Apparently the ghouls have watched “Mean Girls” too many times.
The ghosts are a picnic compared to Paris Smouse’s experience. Smouse, a sophomore biology major, finds Clark C rather labyrinthine.
“You feel like you cannot escape,” Smouse said. “You do not know the exits.”
Smouse also has issues with the centuries-old faculty that inhabits Clark.
“I feel like all the teachers are so ancient, they are ghosts and spirits,” Smouse said.
In a building as aged and replete with spooks, it seems impossible that things could get any worse. Students have their own ideas for how to make that happen including taking away the vending machines.
“If the lighting was worse, it would be really creepy,” Halverson said.
Alley, however, thinks Clark is at the peak of its egregiousness.
“That TV uses a VHS,” she said, pointing to a tired piece of equipment from the Bill Clinton years.
More spooky stuff about Clark C:
Around 50 percent of the ceiling tiles in the C-wing of the Clark building contain asbestos, Eric March, the safety and industrial hygiene manager for CSU, said in an interview with the Collegian on Feb. 23. The building is safe as long as the asbestos-containing areas are not disturbed.
Collegian reporter Mir-Yashar Seyedbagheri can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. His Twitter handle is @dudesosad.