DISCLAIMER: This advice probably shouldn’t actually be followed, but you should read it anyway because it’s funny.
How do I stay motivated when I literally don’t want to do anything?
This is a really good question, I struggle with motivation quite often as well. I like to reward myself after I do a certain amount of work. For example, I will reward myself by smoking a bowl after writing the title of my essay. It seems to work pretty well.
I have a crush on my professor, and it makes it really hard to concentrate in class. I feel like a creep but I can’t help it, what do I do?
Honestly, don’t even feel bad about it, this happens all the time. Some of these professors are stunning out here, it’s not your fault. But it’s definitely inappropriate to try and make a move, so you should NOT try that.
If it were me, I would just bury my feelings underneath all my other inner problems that I refuse to deal with. But if you are actually an emotionally healthy person and you can’t do that, then I would suggest trying to get into a different class. Even though it’s pretty late in the semester, it wouldn’t hurt to try. If you can’t do that, skip class and get the notes online or from a friend. Nothing works better than just running away from your problems until they don’t exist anymore!
I am in high school and I’m going to college next year, I’m really scared I’m not going to be motivated enough during school. What do you suggest?
Don’t do it. It’s a trap. Travel the world instead.
It’s already the middle of the semester and I’m failing 7 classes even though I’m only taking 4. Please help.
While Colorado State University has many resources to help you succeed in your education, would you really be a college student if you didn’t constantly procrastinate and do nothing about your problems until the very last minute?
Correct answer: no, you wouldn’t!
Since it’s only the middle of the semester, you really don’t need to worry about your problems until two or three weeks before finals. Then, I would suggest doing as much BS extra credit as possible. Also using all the money that you don’t actually have to buy your professors coffee until they give you a C- isn’t a terrible idea either. Failing 7/4 classes is mathematically impossible, so you should probably double check your schedule. No wonder why you’re failing.
I have 5 tests this week and I’m really overwhelmed. How do I study for all of them?
Find a vampire and convince them to turn you into one too. Though it will be a painful and lengthy transition, afterwards, you won’t be able to sleep anymore and your brain will operate at 100 times the speed as that of a normal human. This means you should be set to ace all of your tests. Plus you’ll be young and hot forever and you’ll sparkle in the sun. Score.
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