The other day, I posted a selfie on Instagram and lost two followers. I did that a few days ago, and a similar thing happened.
There are a few possible reasons for this:
- They realized I’m not going to follow them back.
- I’m really ugly. Like a toe blister.
- They accidentally tapped “Unfollow” whilst stalking my profile.
- They actually hate me (I say good riddance to my haters).
- Or, they simply had a reaction along the lines of “Ugh, selfies.”
I’m going to assume a fair sum of readers agree with number five. Maybe numbers two or three, if you know me.
I’m going to go ahead and say it: I’m super duper pro-selfie.
I love when people feel pretty enough, or funny enough, or whatever enough, to document their face.
Though, I do warn others to be careful taking selfies while walking, because first-hand experience says you will trip or run into someone. And then people look at you like you just made out with Lucifer. Haters.
Regardless of potential hate, I have always been pro-selfie, and will continue to take them, myself.
I was at brunch the other day, because I think that is a classy thing to do (even though I downed that skillet so fast I ended up with food in my shirt).
At the table next to us, a large group documented their (classier) experience using one of the gems created by modern technology: the selfie stick. My friend felt embarrassed for them, but this older group looked like they were having a ball. And that made me happy.
With the selfie stick, all of your friends will be in the picture and you can easily take pictures of strangers doing funny things around you.
(That last part might be kind of frowned upon, but people-watching is my favorite thing and people are hilarious, like, all the time).
In order to avoid treating the aforementioned group like zoo animals, I pretend to be taking a selfie, my own self — duck face and all — but I do not turn on my front-facing camera.
I’m sorry. I shouldn’t perpetuate taking pictures of people like that (though we all know you do it).
Regarding my own casual, stick-less selfies, I am a master at paint-on black eyeliner. When that’s symmetrical, I take a picture of it. Or when I wear cool lipstick. Or when I wear no lipstick. Or when I wear no make up. Or when I’m Snapchatting. Or whenever I darn well feel like.
Selfies posted online are public. This is a new point in history, when we have the capability to share personal beauty on a large scale. Selfies are a way for us to set beauty standards. A job that has typically been entirely monopolized by magazines, television and other forms of mass media is now in the hands (literally) of individual persons.
Sassy with Cassie Over here spittin’ some truths.
Plus, if I post a selfie, maybe Ed Sheeran will see it and love me forever.
I almost started crying at work that other day because I was listening to his music and thinking about how I do not have tickets to his Red Rocks show. Someone get me those tickets, please. I feel like crying again.
But, back to the point, we should all be unapologetically pro-selfie. What’s wrong with cute people knowing they’re cute and documenting it?
People: “Lol, stupid girls taking selfies in public.”
Me: “Nope. Lol on you. Lol on YOU.”
Collegian A&E Columnist Cassie Maack can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org or on Twitter @maackcl. She’d also like to point out that it’s her and her sister’s birthweek and, in celebration, she will be wearing a crown to class at least one day this week because she is a self-proclaimed queen. Get ready, world.