Spring break and St. Patrick’s Day. That’s a killer combination for the average college student. The upcoming weekend is bound to bring lots of beer and, most likely, hangovers. If you can’t avoid getting a hangover, at least try to avoid waking up with one in these places:
1. Random House
It’s always disconcerting to wake up in an unfamiliar place. Add in a hangover and you’ve got a pretty rough start to your day. Hopefully if this happens to you, your host will be understanding. Or still sleeping off their night.
2. A Stranger’s Bed
If that doesn’t say awkward, I don’t know what does. Except if the stranger’s there, too. Hopefully you have good morning breath.
3. Another Country
If trying to understand another language gives you a headache on a regular day, imagine trying it when you have a hangover. Can you say confusion central?
4. Not in a House
This makes waking up in a random house sound good. Hopefully your phone made it through the night so you can call a friend for a ride. More importantly in the unpredictable Colorado weather, I hope you brought your coat.
5. Public Bathroom
There’s nothing like a smelly bathroom to help a hangover. On the plus side, at least you have immediate access to a toilet you don’t have to clean. Don’t try to make friends with the people who do, they probably won’t be happy with you.
No one wants to be there. It doesn’t matter how great your night was if it ends you up in jail with a hangover. Try explaining that to your parents. On the bright side, at least now they give you orange suits instead of those stripes that make almost everyone look bad.
The best way to wake up after St. Patrick’s Day? In your own bed feeling rested and ready for the next adventure. If you do wake up with a hangover though, be thankful it’s not in any of these places.
Collegian Entertainment Assistant Editor Amber Johnson can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.