Based on the 4/12 RamTalk — “If you’re new to Colorado, be aware that “spring” is spelled s-t-i-l-l-w-i-n-t-e-r.”
Editor’s note: This column is satire. The Collegian is not responsible for the weather, even if that would be awesome.
Spring has sprung in Colorado and it couldn’t be more beautiful. The crows are cawing, there is an inch of ice on my windshield and I’m fairly sure that my Chihuahua is buried in the two feet of snow that accumulated overnight.
Geese are flying back up north for the winter because penguins have taken over the lagoon and popsicles just don’t sound appetizing. This kind of weather in April may come as a shock to many, but the Meteorology Department here at Colorado State has reminded us time and time again that spring in Colorado is just a fancy way of saying extended winter.
Students were thrilled with the snow day that was given to them, but some are still confused as to why it’s snowing in April. California native and freshman lullaby major Robby Willyam is befuddled by this strange weather.
“Wasn’t Colorado, like, part of Mexico or something?” Willyam said. “And isn’t Mexico, like, hot? I don’t get it.”
Others think that this is just a one-time thing. Sophomore jazz major, Hether World, does not understand the concept of Colorado springtime.
“Ol’ Man Winter must not have anywhere to go, because he’s been hanging around for awhile now,” World said. “But I have no complaints. Colorado and winter go together like hot dogs and jelly, or whatever — they go together well.”
Although it may be colder than the abominable snowman’s snowballs in Colorado right now, the warm weather is on its way to heat up our icy bones. April showers bring May flowers, though April snows bring frostbitten toes. Stay warm, everyone.
Entertainment Writer Davis English can be reached at email@example.com.